Does my cat need a friend?
Many people think of cats as solitary and aloof creatures, recent studies suggest that domestic cats can actually be quite sociable. While some cats thrive in solitude, others may feel lonely and show signs like erratic sleeping or eating patterns. According to Molly DeVoss, a certified feline behavior specialist and founder of Behavior Solutions, cats are adaptable due to their social flexibility, which allows them to live comfortably among other animals.
If your cat seems to enjoy the company of others, it may benefit from a second cat or companion. Meeting their social needs can help build intimate ties and improve their well-being. Always keep an eye out for behavior changes and consult your vet if you’re unsure about adding another pet.
Signs Your Cat Wants a Friend
1. Clinginess
When a cat starts to meow frequently and follows you everywhere, even into the bathroom, it’s a clear sign that they feel alone and might be asking for more affection. This behavior can be linked to an insecure-ambivalent attachment style, where your cat seeks extra attention due to separation concerns, especially if you’ve recently returned from work or have been away for months or even years.
They often signal their discomfort through demanding conduct, wanting more social interaction and company. Studies suggest that introducing another cat or encouraging more playing and resting together can be beneficial in reducing these anxious behaviors.
The constant meowing and the need to move closer to you are signs of their need for companionship to feel emotionally secure. Keeping your cat mentally stimulated and emotionally reassured can help them feel less stressed when alone.
2. Excessive Grooming
If your cat starts exhibiting obsessive grooming, it could be more than just an odd behavior. Often, it is a peculiar way for the cat to self-soothe when feeling lonely or stressed. If the cat seems sad, unkempt, or out of sorts, this might be an indication of emotional distress or even a medical ailment.
As a first step, it’s best to consult a vet to determine if the grooming is caused by health issues or emotional needs. With the right attention, you can help your cat feel better, providing the benefit of a more balanced life and perhaps even the companionship they crave.
3. Positive experience with other cats
When a cat seeks a friend, it shows their need for companionship and comfort. After a separation or changes in the household, some cats may face difficulty adjusting. However, with the right introduction, a new kitty can bring a sense of happiness and well-being to a cat.
This bond between the cats can help them live harmoniously, with the new buddy acting as a replacement for their previous friend. Over time, these cats become healthy, and their friendship strengthens, improving their overall well-being.
4. Energy changes

When a cat feels bored or depressed, its energy levels can drop. A lonely kitty may lack the mental and physical enrichment needed to stay active and satisfied. Lusvardi says that a sudden change in energy can happen when a new friend with a similar temperament is introduced. This can help the cat feel much more engaged and help shift its mood. Providing plenty of activities may also assist in boosting the cat’s energy, making it feel less lonely and more content.
5. Destruction and litter box changes
Changes in your cat’s litter box can create confusion and lead to destructive behaviors. When the litter box’s placement or litter is altered, it may trigger anxious behaviors, such as urination in inappropriate places. Cats are creatures of habit, and a sudden change in routine can cause stress, especially if they experience separation anxiety or loneliness.
Research shows that having another cat in the home can help reduce this stress and prevent messes. In my experience, adding a second cat helped my pet feel more secure and minimized the destruction caused by anxiety. If the issues continue, consulting a veterinarian can help eliminate the problem and restore a healthy routine.
6. Proper socialization
For a feline to form healthy bonds, socialization is critical. A kitten that grows up with its mother and siblings is more likely to adapt well to unfamiliar situations later in life. Research shows that early exposure to new environments, like seeing others through a window or meeting new people, helps them feel more comfortable with new friends.
Some cats might not have responded positively at first, but with patience and proper handling, they can adjust to social interactions over time. This process, although gradual, is essential for a cat’s happiness and well-being.
7. They Have Feline Friends In The Neighborhood
When a cat is near other cats in the neighborhood, they often feel more relaxed and enjoy their company. It seems that they like to share their territory, like when one sits calmly while the other sunbathes nearby. This doesn’t mean your cat wants to accept a new cat into the family, but it is a positive sign that they are comfortable with the presence of other cats. They are more likely to feel at ease with another cat nearby, even if they don’t engage much.
8. They’re Used To Being In A Multi Cat Household
A cat that has lived with other cats in a group is more likely to seek out a friend when rehomed. These cats are used to the company of other felines and can find a solitary life challenging. The introduction of a new cat into the home can often go smoothly, allowing the two to develop a bond. Cats that have had a taste of companionship are naturally inclined to accept another friend over time.
How To Choose a Second Cat
When you’re thinking about bringing a new feline friend into your home, there are a few important things to keep in mind. Start by evaluating your kitty’s play style, age, and temperament, and how they might align with a sibling’s needs.
A behaviorist can offer valuable tips and suggestions on the best match, while your veterinarian can help identify any potential medical issues that could impact the bond. Understanding the longing for a friend and the level of play your kitty enjoys is important to finding the perfect matchmaker for your home.
There are a few important keys to keep in mind:
Age
When getting a second cat, the age of the new feline is a critical consideration. Much like how a 25-year-old person might have a different experience with a 15-year-old, the difference in life stages can affect how they get along. A younger cat, such as a kitten, might bring a lot of energy, potentially overwhelming your current cat.
However, an age-matched or senior cat is often a better choice for a more harmonious friendship. According to Lusvardi and DeVoss, cats that are at similar stages in their lives are more likely to adapt to each other and form a lasting bond, guaranteeing a smoother transition.
Gender
Choosing a second cat often brings up the age-old question of whether to get a cat of the same gender or opposite gender. While many assume opposite gender cats will get on better, it’s not always the case. From my experience, the gender matters less than the cats’ personalities.
If both cats are neutered, they are more likely to live together peacefully, regardless of whether they are the same gender. The most important thing is ensuring that the second cat matches well with your existing cat to promote harmony in your home. There are no guarantees, but the right choice can help make the transition smoother.
History
Choosing a second cat to be a companion for your existing cat has always been an age-old question for pet owners. Gender plays a role, but it doesn’t guarantee that the two cats will get on well, whether they are the same gender or opposite gender.
It’s essential to consider both cats’ neuter status because a neutered cat is usually more relaxed and adaptable. Being aware of their health, vaccination, and care needs is critical to avoid problems and injuries. With the right care, it can lead to a welcoming addition to your family, but it’s important to prepare for any surprises along the way.
Temperament
When selecting a new cat, it’s important to consider their temperament in relation to your existing cat’s. If your cat is docile, a rambunctious kitten might cause shifts in their behavior, while an adult cat with a consistent temperament could be a better match. Look for distinctive traits and personalities that will help both cats stay comfortable together as housemates. Lusvardi highlights that choosing a cat with a compatible personality is key to ensuring a smooth transition.
How do I know if my cats like each other?
If your cats are getting along, they will frequently greet each other with a friendly meow or even rub their noses together. They might lie next to each other while sleeping, often touching or grooming each other’s bodies. These are clear indicators of their bond and trust. When cats display these social behaviors, it’s their way of showing they see themselves as part of the same group. These small signs suggest they enjoy each other’s company and are becoming good members of the household.
What should I do if one cat dies?
If one of your cats passes away, it’s normal for the remaining cat to feel lost and lonely, especially if they have lived alongside each other for many years. Your surviving cat may want another companion to help them cope with the death of their mate. I always recommend giving your cat some time to adjust, but also considering adopting a kitten or another cat to provide the company they need. Some cats may feel the absence deeply, and offering a new friend might help them find balance in their life.
Can Puppies and Cats Be Best Friends?
It’s a common question for pet owners.can cats and puppies truly become friends? The answer is yes, but it takes patience and understanding. Cats are naturally more independent and cautious, while puppies tend to be more energetic and playful. However, with the right introduction and environment, they can form a unique bond.
Start by gradually exposing them to each other, keeping their social boundaries in mind. Over time, they can adjust and even become great companions, offering each other the company they need. Their relationship will depend on their individual personalities, but with the right steps, they can live happily together in the same home.